humans; a sum of their parts

hard to be soft; tough to be tender,

come take my pulse,

the pace is on a runaway train,

if you're still alive;

my regrets are few,

if my life is mine;

what shouldn't I do?

i get wherever I'm going,

i get whatever I need,

while my blood's still flowing

and my heart still beats . . .

 Metric

Oftentimes, I find it hard to keep myself on the right side of reality; the events of the past week have forced me to take a long, hard look at myself. Perspective. It is a funny thing. In its most physical, temporal sense -- I've never been less able to gauge perspective than during the past seven days. This is largely due to the bouts of car crash induced dizziness that creep up on me periodically, especially when stood in bookshops on excessively squeaksome ladders. The actual action of crashing, on the other hand, nicely puts a life into perspective.

Rock bottom is a phenomenom that I now believe in, though I don't profess to have hit it by any means. Merely that setbacks are but springboards, and you can't give up. Life is too precious, too fleeting by half to squander it upon people that don't mean everything to you. Nothing by halves. I appreciate that this reads as a garbled, self indulged stream of forced positivity; but my issue is not my heart isn't in it. I mean too much; words can't reasonably articulate the feeling that I have now. It is not so much, that I am glad to be alive. Rather, I feel life has thrown down the gauntlet-- and the next move is mine.

Fighting back, above and beyond.
Never giving up.
And not to take the moments for granted;
which might otherwise be your last.



In other news;
I don't like clubbing, I like bonfires and camping, forests and far reaching fields; no more pretenses, please.
Exeter University is much better than Warwick, but nothing on Edinburgh.
Expect a post about the wonderfulll gigs I attended last week, when I'm in a better frame of mind. I cannot do them justice, now.

Just be thankful to be alive, my friend. Humans might be more than a sum of their parts, I don't dispute this: but you weren't hurt, so suck it the fuck up.
peace x