humans; a sum of their parts

hard to be soft; tough to be tender,

come take my pulse,

the pace is on a runaway train,

if you're still alive;

my regrets are few,

if my life is mine;

what shouldn't I do?

i get wherever I'm going,

i get whatever I need,

while my blood's still flowing

and my heart still beats . . .

 Metric

Oftentimes, I find it hard to keep myself on the right side of reality; the events of the past week have forced me to take a long, hard look at myself. Perspective. It is a funny thing. In its most physical, temporal sense -- I've never been less able to gauge perspective than during the past seven days. This is largely due to the bouts of car crash induced dizziness that creep up on me periodically, especially when stood in bookshops on excessively squeaksome ladders. The actual action of crashing, on the other hand, nicely puts a life into perspective.

Rock bottom is a phenomenom that I now believe in, though I don't profess to have hit it by any means. Merely that setbacks are but springboards, and you can't give up. Life is too precious, too fleeting by half to squander it upon people that don't mean everything to you. Nothing by halves. I appreciate that this reads as a garbled, self indulged stream of forced positivity; but my issue is not my heart isn't in it. I mean too much; words can't reasonably articulate the feeling that I have now. It is not so much, that I am glad to be alive. Rather, I feel life has thrown down the gauntlet-- and the next move is mine.

Fighting back, above and beyond.
Never giving up.
And not to take the moments for granted;
which might otherwise be your last.



In other news;
I don't like clubbing, I like bonfires and camping, forests and far reaching fields; no more pretenses, please.
Exeter University is much better than Warwick, but nothing on Edinburgh.
Expect a post about the wonderfulll gigs I attended last week, when I'm in a better frame of mind. I cannot do them justice, now.

Just be thankful to be alive, my friend. Humans might be more than a sum of their parts, I don't dispute this: but you weren't hurt, so suck it the fuck up.
peace x

without clear direction

Forgive me my recent frenzy of blog-tivity; I don't expect you to continue for long, but as a foray and means of distraction from the horrors of english and history coursework, you have served me well. Procrastination is an awful, iwksome impulse. Nonetheless, my inability to sit down and actually motivate myself so as not to fail has made me realise something. I wish I'd applied for deferred entry.

The last two days have been glorious, albeit if only by contrast to the insipid danknessof the past twenty. I crave spring; the chance to stretch out these cramped legs of mine and just run. Contrarily, I also crave direction. A holiday, a set of summer plans so as not to squander this precious time. Time to start making things happen.

On a slightly unrelated note, if anyone cares to sponsor me (as well as Anna, Emma, Penny, Charlotte, Hannah and Ella) then get in touch! We are going to be running in Delamere; Race for Life. I will put the details up here soon, fully aware that no one will actually read this!x

Do you ever get the impression that blogging is tantamount to the first sign of madness: talking to yourself?.. nope, just me then.

<33 the images inspired wanderlust,
Over the Bridge @photographyserved.com
Until next time xx

peanut butter and tea?

This week, I have realised something: I am totally and
unequivocally a slave to tea and peanut butter.
This is a sad day for me.
Time to put on the kettle.

<3xx